I think this year is passing in supersonic speed. Its April already!!!!!!!!! :(
Maybe out of all the years,I especially feels like hanging on (more like clinging) to this year even more so because.........................next year I'll be (GASP!!!!!) 30!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Rolls eyes) Yeah, yeah, drama je lebih and bukan nak insult org lain kata diorang dah tua (walaupun betul) tapi I dont feel close to 30. (Dah la tua, tak sedar2 lagi pulak tu). Not that 30 is OLD, but it seems antara umur 29 dan 30 tu, boleh selit 5 tahun celah tu. Its like a huge leap walaupun pada hakikatnya hanya 1 tahun.
And to add salt to injury, while I will be spending my saki baki 20-an on November, suami saya baru nak masuk 29! Dem dem dem it!!!!
Maybe its about how ur body is aging but ur mind doesnt want to catch up. I am not depressed about it; another year celebrated is another year to be thankful. That you are given another year of life where many are denied of that chance. But also another year passes and u feel u have nothing to show for. Did u leave a mark somewhere in the world, in someone else's life or in ur own life?
Usually u go into the new year, or ur bday with hopeful things to do, to achieve, to conqueur. But alas, most of them are just that; just another list for another year. Time never stops for u to complete what u hope to achieve. It just passes by.
So, whats the moral of this post? Just to sigh and moan on things that I want to do but then give a million of excuses on why it wasnt materialized? I dont know. Like helping out at old people's house, rumah anak yatim. Tiap2 tahun cakap nak buat, tapi tak buat2 lagi.
Maybe this post is just to make me feel better. To show the world that I have a conscience. But dont have the balls or to sacrifice enough to make it actually come true. And then I feel bad about it.
When u break ur own promise to urself, thats the worst kind of all.
:(